Someday my day will come
Well, the weekend didn’t go as planned for me. As you know I had been planning on doing the Syracuse half Ironman earlier today with my daughter Brittany. I was feeling good up until Friday evening, I would even go as far as to say I was confident. We drove to Syracuse Friday night and checked into our hotel. I figured I would get a good nights sleep and then check in to the race on Saturday morning. Well, I didn’t sleep all night. Seriously, not a wink. I had Jackie up in the middle of the night and everything! She was very helpful and didn’t put any extra pressure on me, even though I have spent thousands of dollars and countless hours chasing this dream. I don’t usually sleep well in a new environment but it is usually not all that bad. I laid there in bed thinking about all of the things that I had on my mind. Our pending house move this week, the CAC poker run I am involved with organizing in a couple weeks, Brandon going off to University (my baby is leaving), work, oh yeah and my freaking fear of drowning during the Ironman swim! Let’s just say my lizard brain, the part of my brain that gives me negative thoughts, was working overtime. When everyone got up on Saturday morning I was a wreck and a sleepless zombie. I had convinced myself that I couldn’t do the race and as a result did not go through with the check-in as planned.
Am I a failure? I hope not. I figure if I can continue to learn and grow as a person and learn how to squash this unrealistic fear, I will complete this goal soon enough. Today just wasn’t the day it was meant to be. It is not a waste of training time, I am fitter than most 46 year olds I know, and the fact that I train these crazy distances week after week confirms that. I just need to get over this little mental hurdle and then watch out, I will be unstoppable. 🙂
Enough about me, lets move on to better news today. Brittany friggin’ rocked the race today. I mean seriously kicked ass. She completed the 1/2 Ironman distance in 5:11. That was over an hour faster than her time last year that sent her to the World Championships. In fact, I think she finally realizes just how good she is as she was only 10 minutes shy of being on the “Pro” podium today. Pros in triathlon do this full time for a living, Brittany on the other hand fits it in between the other 15 things going on in her life every day, like working two jobs and being a full time University student who has never seen a “B” in her life. Please, please, please, Brittany give me a hint at how get half of the courage you have to chase these crazy goals that you do. Yes, I am a proud parent, of both of my kids, we are very lucky to have them!
See you at the finish line…….. Someday soon……